05:02 11th February 2013 | Child Bearing Stigma

Nigerian Women Natural Victims Child Bearing Family Assumptions Couple Credible Specialist Parenthood

It is the natural desire for most couples to have their own children. This is particularly relevant in Nigeria where the premium placed on childbearing is so high that they become necessary to secure the marital union in harmony. Having to deal with infertility can be emotionally challenging and consuming. As mentioned earlier we natural assume our fertility is intact as we grow up and it is often confusing and overwhelming when we cannot conceive in spite of our efforts. Many couples experience frustrations and an overwhelming sense of helplessness and inadequacy as they try to grapple with their current realities. Others experience isolation and resentment amongst other couples with children. Other emotions commonly described include fear of the future; a powerful sense of foreboding, anger at having to deal with such a situation, guilt that they may have brought this on themselves due to previous lifestyle choices, shame at not being able to fulfill their  perceived obligations, devastation and hopelessness.

These emotions are even worse for women who are naturally blamed and questioned when the couple is not achieving pregnancy. The central role that women play in the child bearing process makes them natural victims of this assumptions and prejudices. Family and friends, who fall into different categories ranging from being well meaning to being spiteful, also exert an unquantifiable amount of pressure the couple which often drives a wrench between them. The most important thing any couple must do is to remain focused; educate themselves on their condition, seek help early from credible specialists, support, reassure and encourage each other as they start on their journey to parenthood.

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